All posts tagged with "host: simon amstell".
Anna: Can you tell me what the #1 STI is, Simon?

Simon: Umm...

Anna: Have you been checked?

Simon: Have I been checked?

Anna: Yeah.

Simon: As an employee of the BBC... there is no need for me to be checked because I've never... had sex.

Anna: To be honest, in that outfit, I can see why.

Simon: If this doesn't get me laid then I don't know what will. I'm adorable!

poles
  • 05.30.10
  • 8
Simon: Mamma Mia.

Dominic: Here I go again.

Simon: No, I was looking for "Does it show again?". Mamma Mia.

Phil: Does it show again?

Simon: No, it was "Now I really know." Mamma Mia.

Phil: Here I go again?

Simon: No, it was "Even if I say". Mamma Mia.

Phil: Here I go again?

Simon: No, it was "Does it show again?" again.

poles
  • 05.29.10
  • 5
Simon: I'm a big fan of The Klaxons, of course.

Jamie: Thank you very much.

Simon: There's you, you're Jamie from The Klaxons.

Jamie: I'm Jamie, yes.

Simon: There's also James from The Klaxons.

Jamie: Yes. He's better-looking than me isn't he?

Simon: Quite hot, hot.

Jamie: I know. That's why I got him in.

Simon: Do you um.. do people ever get confused and book you, for a tv show, thinking it's him?

Jamie: Now... I don't mean to be funny, but I think it happened for us whether or not I'm sitting quite close to this man here.

Phil: No, I wanted the big, lumpy one.

poles
  • 05.29.10

SIMON: Hello and welcome to budget late-night indie show, Never mind the buzzcocks. I’m bitter, snotty-faced, little public schoolboy, Simon Amstell and I’d like to begin with an apology. On last week’s show I upset Preston from Preston and Chantelle. I realise now that they are better than me. Preston is a wonderful singer and Chantelle invented the popular saying “Oh my God!” I was unfair in my representation of Chantelle’s book. It’s not bad, there are some really interesting bits. (READING THE BOOK) “Suddenly…” Okay!

(via alisea)

SIMON: Hello and welcome to budget late-night indie show, Never mind the buzzcocks. I’m bitter, snotty-faced, little public schoolboy, Simon Amstell and I’d like to begin with an apology. On last week’s show I upset Preston from Preston and Chantelle. I realise now that they are better than me. Preston is a wonderful singer and Chantelle invented the popular saying “Oh my God!” I was unfair in my representation of Chantelle’s book. It’s not bad, there are some really interesting bits. (READING THE BOOK) “Suddenly…” Okay!

(via alisea)

poles
  • 05.29.10
  • 76

"Nash said that one of her one hundred and nine thousand friends on Myspace said ‘he wanted to put a bomb up my cunt.’ You may laugh, but the metropolitan police had to evacuate the area… and it was six hours before normal service was resumed."

— Simon Amstell
poles
  • 05.20.09